IMMOLATION: CHAPTER 42

  Sorry this is a bit late, but as you will see it's a bit longer than the usual chapters. Hope you enjoy it.

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Snow fell lightly and was just beginning to stick to the ground when they wheeled Tom out the front doors. He wanted to see if he could walk out on his own, but the hospital had it's rules. Mike and Melanie were already working on opening the car door while the nurse his wheelchair up to the curb. From head to foot, Tom wore pressure garments that were designed to shape his scarring into a more natural form. He'd have to wear them for the next year or so, day and night, until his scarring was set.

Tom lifted his face to the falling snow, shutting his eyes and imagining what each tiny flake should feel like.

“We can take that mask off for a few minutes,” Mike said as he came over to help Tom into the car.

The nurse looked like she was about to scold Mike for even suggesting such a thing but Tom waved her off.

“It won't make any difference,” Tom said, “I still don't have any feeling.”

“None?” Melanie asked, coming over to stand next to Mike.

Tom shook his head.

“But I thought your doctors told you it would come back?”

“They said it might,” Tom corrected her, “And it still might. Won't know for certain until the scarring's done forming.”

“Can you feel anything?” Melanie asked.

“Leave him alone,” Mike butted in, “If we want to have time to visit Joan before Mike's flight then we need to get him into the car and on our way.”

“Sorry,” Melanie said, and together she and Mike helped Tom into the back seat.

“What time it it?” Tom asked after a few minutes.

“Just past noon,” Mike replied.

“And my flight's at six?” Tom asked, a bit more nervous.

“Yeah,” Mike said, “And you'll probably want to be there a couple hours early because security has gotten ridiculous.”

“Hasn't it always been?” Tom joked.

“Yeah, well, you've missed a lot over the last several months that you've been in the hospital.”

“Yeah, I heard about all those nuclear power plants,” Tom said.

Mike and Melanie looked at each other.

“What?” Tom asked, “Did I miss something?”

“Yeah,” Melanie said, looking back at Tom with a shocked expression on her face.

“Such as?” Tom asked.

“Such as the collapse of a dozen or so countries and the war over in Europe and Asia because there's not enough oil to go around and the world's running out of fuel.”

Tom sat bolt upright in his seat. “What?”

“Yeah,” Mike said, “I had to sell the book store because of it.”

“What?” Tom exclaimed even louder.

“Seriously, Tom,” Melanie said, “How could you not know this? It's about the only thing they talk about on the news these days.”

Tom knew how he'd missed it. He'd stopped watching the news, stopped reading the paper, stopped asking people about the world outside his hospital room whenever they came to visit because it was too depressing to hear how bad things were getting. But he didn't think it would escalate this far.

“Guess I was just too busy with therapy,” Tom said.

They continued to drive for some time. The snow began coming down more heavily and Mike had to speed up the windshield wipers. Few other cars were out on the road and it only served to remind Tom of how different the world was, and how much he'd missed.

“At least traffic's not so bad,” Tom remarked.

Mike and Melanie managed meager laughs and Tom sank back into his chair.

“So how's Joan?” Tom asked.

Again, Mike and Melanie shared a look.

“You sure you want to see her?” Mike asked.

If truth be told, Tom wasn't sure. In the few times Melanie had come with Mike to visit Tom in the hospital, she'd always danced around the subject of Joan. She'd told him about Joan's new enclosure, from which Tom had guessed Joan's fire was still getting worse, but other than that he hadn't been able to learn much else.

“Tom?” Mike said, bringing Tom out of his revery.

“Hmm, what?” Tom asked.

“I asked if you were sure you wanted to see Joan?”

“Yeah,” Tom said, “Yeah, just to stop in and say hi.” Tom rubbed his gloved hands together, still surprised by the lack of sensation, as he tried to hide his trepidation. “I figure I won't be able to see her again for a while, any way.”

“Yeah,” Mike agreed, “We'll miss you.”

“I'll be back, don't worry,” Tom assured him.

“We'll see how desperate you are to come back once you've gotten use to your moms cooking again and free rent.”

Tom smiled, or at least he did what he thought approximated to a smile. The scaring and nerve damage had a way of scrambling his expressions. Either way, Tom figured it didn't matter since there wasn't anyone to see it.

“Yeah, let me tell you,” Tom teased, “It's every grown mans wish to be living in his parents basement.”

“It's too bad they weren't able to fly out here and get you themselves,” Melanie said.

“Not surprising, though,” Tom said, “Considering what you guys told me about the price of gas I'm surprised they could afford to fly me home at all.”

Mike and Melanie nodded solemnly and Tom followed suit, enjoying the freedom of life outside the hospital while at the same time dreading its uncertainties. In the hospital, at least, he knew what to expect. He knew when his meals were, knew when his physical therapy would be. He'd flirted with a number of his nurses and, even though his good looks and perfect hair were now gone, a few of them even flirted back. It was in that small world within a world that he found safety and that was why he'd shut out the rest of the world. With his life already in distress, he couldn't deal with the rest of the world falling apart around him.

But now he had to face that breaking world with its wars and fuel shortages and friends with broken dreams.

Tom shut his eyes as hot tears welled up in them. His eyes, the only part of him that still had any feeling, the only part of him that wasn't burned by Joan. He relished the sensation in his otherwise numb world but at the same time he hated that it had to come from his gnawing anguish.

“We're here,” Mike announced after some time and the car slowed to a stop.

Tom was about to unbuckle his seat belt when Mike said, “Roll down your windows.”

Tom looked up and it was then that he noticed there were armed guards standing on both sides of the car. When Tom hesitated with his window, the guard outside gave it a sharp rap with his knuckles.

“Sorry,” Tom said once he'd unrolled his window, “Just got out of the hospital.”

“We're here to see Joan,” Melanie said.

“Names?” The guard at Melanie's window asked.

“This is my boyfriend Mike,” Melanie said, pointing as she spoke, “And this is Tom. He's an old friend of Joan's who just got out of the hospital.” Melanie added when the guard gave Tom and his body suit a double take. “We're on our way to drop him off at the airport and thought we'd stop in to say hi to Joan.”

“I'm sorry Melanie,” The guard said, “But we're not allowed to admit visitors without prior authorization.”

“Seriously?” Tom asked, earning a sharp glare from the guard, “I mean, does Joan get that many visitors?”

Melanie and Mike gave Tom worried looks, as though they hoped to communicate that arguing was not a good idea.

“Besides Melanie?” The guard asked, “No.”

Tom blinked. “Wait,” He said, “You recognize Melanie and you're still going to turn us away?”

The guard was silent, his jaw alternately clenching and relaxing. Finally, he spoke. “Today's not a good day for visitors.”

Melanie slumped in her seat and Mike made to begin reversing the car.

“No,” Tom said a bit louder than he'd intended, “I may not get another chance to see Joan and—

“Tom!” The shock of hearing Mike speak so forcefully drove Tom into silence. “Joan's having a bad day.”

“Then lets go cheer her up,” Tom said, still not understanding what the big deal was.

“Joan's,” Melanie began but the guard at her door cut her off.

“Drive in,” He said.

“What?” Mike and Melanie said at once.

“He's Tom?” The guard asked, “Joan's Tom?”

“If you mean the guy who Joan burned,” Tom said, not liking being talked about when he was right there, “Then yes, that's me.”

“It might actually do her some good to see you,” The guard said, “Drive on in.”

Mike, Melanie and Tom couldn't believe the sudden change in events but weren't going to argue any further as Mike drove past the guard post. Tom looked out the back window and saw the guard following in his jeep, talking on his radio. Ahead, a large concrete structure jutted out of the otherwise flat and empty ground. This wasn't the prison as he'd expected it to be, it was something different, something new.

The building was octagonal and several stories high, though the distinct lack of windows made it difficult to tell exactly how tall it was. Smoke, or steam, Tom couldn't tell which, rose from the roof in a thick plum that stood out against the cold gray sky.

“Cozy,” Tom said as they got out of the car.

“Joan's been in here for about three months now,” Melanie said, “I tried to visit her once a week but she's been having so many bad days lately that I haven't been able to get in to see her at all this month.”

They were joined by the guard a moment later and he motioned for them to go in; he followed behind. Once inside, they were all run through security and then the guard, who was apparently their escort now, took them over to an elevator.

“We'll go up to the observation deck first,” He said, “And we'll see how things go from there.”

They all filed into the elevator and the guard pushed the button. The floor jerked and Tom's stomach turned. He never did like elevators, or airplanes for that matter since he was so prone to motion sickness. The thought of having a six hour flight ahead of him did not make him feel any better.

“So what's wrong with Joan?” Tom asked in the hopes of distracting himself from the unpleasant swirling in his stomach.

The guard only gave Tom a withering look as the elevator doors slid open. Before them was a balcony encased in a thick glass shell that overlooked the interior of the building. The guard led them all forward and right as he reached the railing to look down the glass in front of him flashed with fire. Tom stopped walking immediately and memories of the night Joan burned him flooded unwanted into his mind.

“Come down, come down, come down, come down,” A voice from below called to them.

The guard didn't seem phased by the fire and he pressed a button on the railing while leaning over a small microphone Tom hadn't noticed before.

“You're friends are here to see you,” He said.

More fire shot up from below and for a brief moment the entire observation deck was engulfed in flame. Tom shut his eyes and reached out to Mike to steady himself. He knew his grip on Mike was too tight and he thought he heard Mike grunt a little but made no effort to pull free from Tom's grasp.

“Melanie and Mike are here,” The guard said.

No response.

“And Tom's here too,” The guard said just as Tom regained his composure enough to open his eyes once more.

“Tom's dead!” Joan shrieked from below and though no more fire hit the balcony there was the distinct glow of fire emanating from below.

Tom made his way over to the intercom and the guard moved to make room for him. Down below them about thirty feet, Tom could see Joan, burning. She sat in the middle of a ring of stones she'd apparently piled up herself. Her enclosure was scorched black, making it difficult to make out any other features. Joan's clothes were burned in places but not so badly as Tom had expected. As he watched, Joan swayed back and forth, laying her hands on alternating side of the stone ring.

“She's been burning for almost two weeks straight,” The guard whispered.

“Um,” Tom began, not knowing what exactly he should say.

The guard was still holding down the button to the intercom and Joan sat up still when she heard Tom's voice, though Tom couldn't tell if that was because she recognized it or if it was just a different voice from that of the guards.

“I'm looking for a book,” Tom continued, saying the first thing that came to his mind, “And I was wondering if you had it in paperback?”

Joan's fire went out.

“Can I come down?” Tom asked.

The guard immediately took his finger off the intercom button. “What are you thinking?” He asked.

“Her fire's out,” Tom said, pointing to Joan who still had yet to respond.

“I would think that you of all people would know that that can change without a moments notice.”

“Yeah, Tom,” Mike said, rubbing his arm where Tom had been gripping only moments before, “I don't think that's a very good idea.”

“Tom?” Joan called from below.

“Yes, I'm still here,” Tom replied, holding down the intercom button himself.

“If you want to come down,” Joan said, “That would be fine. I promise I won't burn you.”

Tom looked to the guard who bit his lip, thinking. Tom was himself surprised by his sudden desire, his need to go down to Joan. He couldn't explain what had happened to his fear but ever since he saw Joan down below in her circle of rocks, looking so different from before. She was so scared, so weak, and she had been the one to give him courage.

“Tom?” Joan called out again, a tear in her voice.

Tom moved to the microphone but the guard held him back and leaned in instead. Tom's heart fell.

“He'll be down in a moment, Joan,” The guard said and then turned off the intercom. “Be careful,” He said to Tom, “And good luck.”

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So tell me, what are your thoughts on Tom? Have any of you ever dealt with serious burns? Have I described his state sufficiently or should there be more? Less?